Take Me Off Speaker! When Did We All Lose Our Telephone Manners?

If you want to call me a boomer, I'll take it.

There are some things that never change or at least they shouldn't.

Since when did it become appropriate to answer every phone call on speaker (in your car, in your home, in your office) without notifying the caller that they're on speaker?

There's a reason to call person-to-person.  Otherwise, we could just use the "party line."  Uh-oh.  I think I just dated myself.

Nevertheless, if I wanted to talk to you, your boyfriend, your girlfriend, your kids, your nanny, your cube-mate or your housekeeper, I would have called them and not you.

There are times when you have to use the speakerphone (like when you're driving).  But, please have the common courtesy to at least notify the caller that you're not alone.

This should be right up there with not changing your profile photo on zoom to a cat picture.

Save yourself and the rest of us the embarrassment.

You're welcome.

Zoom Fatigue

I'm a people person.  I love people.  Most of the time.  Most people.

Which is why virtual activities and zoom meetings versus zero interaction with other people is a much better option for me.

However, sixteen months into the pandemic, post-pandemic, possible pandemic part two has me completely worn out.

I've run out of virtual backgrounds, zoom lighting tricks, outdoor options.

I am quite simply over it.

That said, please people get vaccinated so that we can get back together, in person, in office, in coffee shop, in restaurants, in community meetings and scream in each other's faces rather than at the screen.

Sure, looking presentable on top with sweatpants on the bottom was a real hoot for a while, it's no longer fun.

I want to go back to the pre-pandemic cautiously glancing at my phone while being bored in meetings.

That's all.

Remember when we were stressing about Working From Home - Not so Fast Forward - It's Time to Return to the Office!

 I'll never forget the beginning of pandemic.  I mean, who could? 

My firm was super about getting us set up to work from home and made the transition as smooth as possible.

Sure, we were all working from our kitchens, couches, bedrooms, you name it.

For me, it was a very difficult transition.  No social interaction, no coffee shop experiences, no office services, no one to talk to or to offer a second opinion on that filing or a second set of eyes.

Now nearly a year and a half later, and I'm in rhythm.  

Whereas, I once said "I can't wait to get back into the office," I'm now saying "how will I ever go back to commuting and traffic and the old routine?"

And if I'm really honest, it's causing me more than a little anxiety.

I, for one, would love a hybrid model.  I mean we've proven we can do it?  Or have we?

If you have thoughts about in-person return to work, I'd love to hear them.  All suggestions are welcome.  Remember, there are no wrong answers.

Working from Home - The Good, The Bad, The Lonely

Covid-19 has been surreal.  The illness, deaths, unemployment, lack of human contact, it's a lot. 

None of us have experienced a pandemic before, so who knew what to expect?

For many people, including myself, who are used to the 9 to 5 routine of commuting to and from work, the thought of being able to work from your home sounded like a dream come true.

That is, until it turns into a nightmare.  For over two months, I've been blessed to be able to earn a living, with medical benefits, without having to venture outside the safety of my house.

The flip side of that benefit is the isolation, the day-to-day drone of what feels like "Groundhog's Day" is hard on the mind.  And not so great for the body when you're not walking or getting up to walk to the coffee shop or lunchroom or take breaks.

As the days have turned into weeks, turned into months, I'm finally ready to tackle the reality of formulating a plan.

Here's what I've come up with so far:

Plan to go to bed at night and get up in the morning at the same time each day

Force yourself to get dressed (sweats don't count)

Put on makeup, jewelry and real shoes (not bunny slippers)

Get up at least once an hour to stretch or get water or poke your head outside and get some fresh air

Take a dedicated lunch break

Make an effort to stay in communication with colleagues, clients, vendors, etc.

Join a zoom or online wellness class (exercise or meditation or mindfulness)

If you've got ideas or suggestions on how we can WFH and be more productive and positive, leave me a comment.  I'd love to hear your thoughts.

STAY SAFE

I Was Planning on Getting a Planner - Next Time I Should Plan Ahead

I had such big plans for my paper planner this year.

First of all, I had planned to get one before the end of 2019 so that I could start planning my New Year on a good foot - or pad.

Christmas was close to Thanksgiving in 2019, which means that the new year just crept up on me before I had a chance to pick the perfect planner.

Looks like now, the first event that I'll be planning will be Groundhog Day 2020.  

I guess it's never too late to start planning.

So many planners.  So little time.

Which one to choose. . .?  I've got a lot of planning to do!

Beware the Office Holiday Party

I hope I'm not too late.

I say this every year, and every year, I read about someone who got a little too loose and had way too much fun at the office party.

I'll keep this short and sweet.

• If you think your outfit is inappropriate, it probably is
• If you think you've had too many, you have - switch to water
• Keep your hands to yourself
• To err is human - to get snookered at your holiday party is just plain dumb
• Don't be the first one to arrive
• Don't be the last one to leave
• Have fun - but not too much fun

Book Review: "The Better Sister" by Alafair Burke

The name itself spells trouble.  "The Better Sister."

Alafair Burke's newest novel covers 'the good, the bad and the deadly.'

If you have sisters (raise your hand), you know that a certain amount of sibling rivalry is unavoidable.  Not that it doesn't happen with brothers, it's just I don't have brothers so I can only speak for myself.

Whether there is a "better" sister or not, in our heads, we can't help but feel that Mom and Dad favored you over me. 

This thriller, and it is a thriller, takes that sibling rivalry to a whole new level.  I'm afraid to tell you much for fear of spoiling the ending, but trust me when I tell you it's well worth your time and will give you an adrenaline rush that you didn't even know you needed.

I'm going to read it a second time.

Description from cover:

The murder of a prominent Manhattan lawyer spurs the reunion of two estranged sisters—one the dead man’s widow, the other his ex. To save the teenage boy accused of murdering him, they must confront a history of long-buried secrets and betrayal. But can sisters ever escape the shadows of their past?

The "Eyes" Have It - Lancome Grandiose Mascara

I'm back!

Long time, no blog.  I've been in a bit of a writing slump.

I didn't forget about you.  I've just been working really hard.

So hard that I need a beauty overhaul.  

If I look better, maybe I'll feel better - even if beauty is only skin deep.  

We get so busy commuting, working, running a household and taking care of our families that we forget to take care of ourselves.

That said, I hope you won't mind if I pop on here from time to time to share a few "lifestyle" tips, including great beauty finds.

My most recent discovery is Lancome Grandiose Mascara.

I'm a minimalist when it comes to makeup most days.  Mainly because I'm always getting dressed in a hurry and have little time to put on a decent face.

But I always wear mascara.  

I wanted to tell you about the Lancome Grandiose Mascara.  

Just like everything else, lashes seem to go with age, and the fewer lashes I have, the better mascara I need.  

I also have very sensitive skin and irritate easily but this one so far has been great.

I hope you'll like it as much as I do.

*(Not endorsed by Oprah - the magazine is a prop) :)

Does Your Digital Imprint Define You? Leaving Facebook

I'm often left wondering if I should get back on Facebook.  I've been on hiatus for about seven years now.

I must say it feels pretty liberating not to keep checking to see if someone has "liked" or commented on something that I've posted.  

How important is it what other people think about your activities, your job, your family, your dog, your avocado toast?

I once read that social media often leads to depression.  I honestly don't doubt it.  I remember that awful feeling the first time someone "unfriended" me.  It felt so personal.  So hurtful.

These days, I keep my social media limited pretty much to an anonymous instagram account (mainly because I am adding photography to my bucket list of things to do before I kick it) and LinkedIn.  Somehow LinkedIn feels a lot more adult.  People, for the most part, are a lot more respectful.

When I haven't heard about a family or social event, I often get "Well, it was on Facebook!"  

Nothing against Facebook.  Or social media overall.  

I just prefer to keep my relationships personal and meaningful to me and a select few, rather than 4,522 "friends."

Is AOL O-U-T? Asking for a Friend

I read a lot of "tips and tricks" for the, shall we say, mature worker. 

Among the many resume suggestions, the one that remains a constant is the "don't use an old email address like AOL as it signals to a potential employer that you're a dinosaur.

I gave my email to a millennial and he chuckled and said "Old school, huh?"  Not only was I offended, I let him know that I had multiple email accounts including gmail, hotmail and yahoo, but that my AOL account was the one that I used as a "file cabinet," so to speak.

While I appreciate and embrace new connections, I certainly don't want to lose the old ones.  Let's face it, they all get hacked from time to time.  And unless you have your own personal server, you're still at the mercy of the people who own your email domain.

Anyway, it started me thinking that "if it's not broken, why fix it?"  Is it really important to a potential employer if you're using AOL or gmail or whatever?  

If I were applying for jobs, I would err on the side of caution and use gmail on my resume.

However, does it really make a difference?  Most employers know what they're looking for and it's either experience (which means they're willing to pay) or a younger person for less money.  And besides, if you do land the interview, they're going to see your face at some point.

Sometimes I think we buy into these "myths" and "stereotypes" that don't always play out in reality.

"Bring Your Mask to Work Day" - California Wildfires and Bad Air Days

The past week has been really rough for people in California.

The tragic and devastating wildfires have no only wreaked havoc on the poor people who have lost lives, family members, homes, property, jobs and much more but have created some of the worst air in the world.

If you're a San Francisco commuter/worker you're having a really rough time navigating the smoke and fumes.  Stores can't keep enough masks in stock and the streets look like something out of a movie.

And if you don't believe climate change is real - I don't know what to tell you. 

Maybe pictures say it best.  The stress level is at an all time high.  

Major gratitude to the firefighters from around the country who have come to help out and sincere prayers to all impacted.

Hoping for rain.

Bosses Behaving Badly

Did you think that the days of bosses screaming at their assistants was a thing of the past?

If you did, you've got "another think" coming.

Bosses are still behaving badly at work.  And this is not gender-specific.  We're talking both men and women losing it over what is never a matter of life and death.  How could it be?  We're not doing brain surgery.  We're litigating.  Somehow not the same.

I do appreciate the fact that after they "block their stack," they almost always feel embarrassed.  Because isn't yelling kind of the equivalent of being out of control.  They never want to be out of control.  They just want to control you.

And before you say, "If someone yelled at me, I'd do blah, blah, blah," take a look at your bank account, your mortgage, kids' tuition, electric bill - go outside, take a walk, get a latte and remember don't sweat the small stuff.

And it's all small stuff.

And if my boss loses her cool and I keep mine - who's really winning?

So while smoking is no longer allowed in the workplace, there's still plenty of smoke coming out of the tops of their heads.

Can You Hear Me Now??? Noise Cancelling Headphones in the Office

Guilty.

I often wear headphones and listen to music while doing tasks such as entering time.  It's not the same as if I'm handling a court filing or preparing a pleading shell.  And it doesn't slow me down.

I'm always mindful to make sure that I look up constantly and that my music isn't so loud that I don't respond when someone (especially an attorney) is talking to me.

However, I do take exception to some people who wear noise cancelling headphones at work.  If we're on the same team and sitting right next to each other, I shouldn't have to scream your name or get up and tap you on the shoulder (and startle the heck out of you) to tell you that I need you for something (work-related).

There's a time and place for everything.  They call it 'work' for a reason.

And while I love to enjoy a good podcast or "beach read," as much as the next person, I certainly don't expect the firm to pay me to do it.

Team work, people.

That is all.

Ocean's 8 - A Great Movie Escape - Pun Intended

I usually go to the movies at least twice a month, however, the last couple of months there hasn't been anything that I've really wanted to see.  So, I've been streaming on Netflix.

"Ocean's 8" has an all-star cast of women actors:  Sandra Bullock, Cate Blanchett, Anne Hathaway, Mindy Kawling, Sarah Paulson, Awkwafina, Helena Bonham Carter and Rihanna.

With a line-up like that it's hard to miss.  And the movie hits the mark.

Not an Oscar nominee, but certainly a wonderful way to spend a weekend afternoon.  Entertaining, fast moving, fashions galore and proof once again that the best man for the job is a woman.

In theaters now.

Watch the trailer HERE.

Knowing when the hold them and when to fold them - is it time to look for a new job?

I think we've all been through some form of layoff, reduction in force, hostile work environment, tremendous pressure or a change in environment that has caused us to either change jobs or seriously consider it.

As for me, I've often bolted just in time.  Other times, I've panicked and left too soon.

How do you know when the time is right?

Here are some signs you should perhaps dust off the old resume and update your LinkedIn.

• Long-time employees are starting to leave your company (abruptly)

• Your work assignment has changed drastically (i.e. you've lost the rainmaker on your workload has decreased significantly)

• If you're a person who bills time, your hours have drastically dropped

• The office manager who was once super friendly has recently stopped talking to you 

• When you walk in the lunch room, everybody gets quiet

• Sometimes there is an "ebb and flow" of work and things start to get better.

My motto is best to be proactive than reactive.

You might consider contacting a headhunter to "test the waters."  Shop your resume just for practice.  You may get a nibble and you may not but at the very least you can test your interview skills.  

And most importantly, be very careful in selecting a confidential recruiter and above all, don't talk to your co-workers about your concerns or plans. 

If Secretaries want to be taken Seriously. . .

It occurred to me while riding the train into work this morning that perhaps legal secretaries are often not taken as serious professionals by attorneys because they don't always take each other seriously.

For whatever reason, this profession seems to be one where secretaries (both male and female) feel that they must minimize the accomplishments and knowledge of their colleagues in order to gain favor with the people they support.

Nothing could be further from the truth.  I think that law firms appreciate having an office comprised of well prepared, highly skilled and capable assistants who support them.  

Spreading negative gossip and undermining your co-workers only serves to further the "myth" that secretaries are nothing more than typing coffee klatches.

We need to support and lift each other up.  Each person has his or her own set of unique skills.  Combine that with the basic skills necessary to work in a law office and you get productivity and a happier environment.

Team work.  It's called that for a reason.

Book Review: "The Wife" by Alafair Burke

I had this book for weeks before I started reading it.

Only because I love Alafair Burke's books so much that I wanted to save it.

But when all the reviews for "The Wife" got me so hyped, I couldn't wait any longer.

I'm a huge fan of the Ellie Hatch series, but this one really had me on the edge of my chair.  I raced through it because the suspense was killing me (pun intended).

If you're a mystery lover like me, you'll want to add this one to your reading list.

From the back cover:

When Angela met Jason Powell while catering a dinner party in East Hampton, she assumed their romance would be a short-lived fling, like so many relationships between locals and summer visitors. To her surprise, Jason, a brilliant economics professor at NYU, had other plans, and they married the following summer. For Angela, the marriage turned out to be a chance to reboot her life. She and her son were finally able to move out of her mother’s home to Manhattan, where no one knew about her tragic past.

Six years later, thanks to a bestselling book and a growing media career, Jason has become a cultural lightning rod, placing Angela near the spotlight she worked so carefully to avoid. When a college intern makes an accusation against Jason, and another woman, Kerry Lynch, comes forward with an even more troubling allegation, their perfect life begins to unravel. Jason insists he is innocent, and Angela believes him. But when Kerry disappears, Angela is forced to take a closer look—at both the man she married and the women she chose not to believe. 

Aging out of the Law Firm - Is there a place for older workers in the legal industry?

I found myself today googling  "the world's oldest legal secretary."

Don't laugh.  I'm serious.  I want to know what happens to senior secretaries.  I don't mean people who can't use the technology or who refuse to adapt to change and learn new skills.

In a world of 10.00 dollar avocado toast and 15.00 lattes being consumed by millennials as the "norm," what happens to the mature law firm support staff?

Do they eventually get "phased out," by way of reductions in force or having to jump through so many hoops they just voluntarily leave?

A friend of mine told me recently that her old boss asked her when she planned to retire.  When she told him that she didn't - he said "just let me know.  I'll find someone younger and cheaper."

Does younger and cheaper really work in this industry?  Younger to me means you're ambitious and looking to be paid fairly for your time and talent.  Cheaper to me means that you're hiring people who really aren't top notch.

You can't have it both ways.

Either you want someone who can do the job and do it well or  you want someone to give you a mediocre work product.

With clients demanding more and more for their legal buck these days, firms might want to consider being nicer to their mature staff.  They might be the ones who save the day.

Happy 131st Anniversary to the Hole Punch!

Thanks to "google doodle" I know that today marks the 131st anniversary of the hole punch.

The doodle is adorable and it's a fun little fact, but then I started thinking about how important the hole punch is in this profession.

I mean, there are courts that will toss your documents if they aren't punched in just the right place.  And some Judges have very specific rules - 2 at the top - 3 at the side.

And don't get me started on people who move the ruler guide and then you go and punch your papers and everything gets punched in the wrong place.  And they don't fit the acco fastener (when is the acco fastener's birthday?) or they won't go into the file folder.

And no matter how much people say we're moving towards a paperless office - let's be honest - that's never going to happen.  At least not in my lifetime.

So, while some might laugh it off as a silly little "holiday," I think it's more than that.

You might even call today HOLE-Y!

The first patent for a hole puncher, or Papierlocher für Sammelmappen (paper hole maker for binding) was filed on 14 November 1886 by inventor Friedrich Soennecken.

Mr Soennecken was a German office supplier from the town of Remscheid who founded his own company, F Soennecken Verlag, in 1875.

Do Firms Want Secretaries Who Get the Job Done or Secretaries Who Look Good Doing It? Aging in the Workplace

It happens to the best of us.

And while I'm not sure when I first became aware of it, I'm fairly certain that once you reach the ripe old age of 40 it starts to peek at you in one form or another.

Many of us "seasoned secretaries" (like myself) may have been too busy working hard to actually take note of the first time they realized that some of their attorneys don't just want the job done, they want someone who looks "perfect" doing it.  Unfortunately, we can't have everything we want.

Now, I'm going to go ahead and play the gender card here - this is much more common among male attorneys than female.  Although, women attorneys don't get a complete pass.

However, the minute your roots begin to show, ageism starts to take root.

We all know that the role of the legal secretary has changed drastically over the years, but skills are skills.  And as long as I have them, I plan to use them.

So, if you don't mind my grey hair, I'm going to get to work.